Guide to the Holiday Movies
The holiday movie season is one of our least favorites. We already have half of the local megaplex filled with dreck designed to attract mom's with SUV's full of curtain climbing yard apes who are out of school. Throw in a couple of holiday duds that the studios hope will become the next "Christmas Story", at least one sequel and a couple of truly sappy chick flicks, and you have a holiday movie season that is just as appealing as a 4 year old fruitcake and the hideous sweater that Aunt Martha knitted for you.
So let's take a look at what Hollywood is putting in our stockings this year....
Bridgette Jones: The Edge of Reason -- If we have to sit thru this film, it might drive us to the edge of insanity.
The Polar Express -- Nice animation, and we like Tom Hanks, but we can only stand so many movies packed with kids. And this one didn't make the cut.
The Incredibles -- Our review of this one is up and has caused a bit of controversy around the office. John is usually kind to Pixar films, but only gave this one 3 stars. Some of our other staff think it was a bit better than that.
Alexander -- Well, at least it makes Troy look better.
The SpongeBob Squarepants Movie -- Ok, forgive me, but I don't get SpongeBob. If you do, you'll probably see this one regardless of what I say.
Christmas with the Kranks -- Tim Allen and Jamie Lee Curtis decide to blow off Christmas, then they decide not to. Uhm, ok.
National Treasure -- A big budget Nicolas Cage and Jerry Bruckheimer film. Probably smart move releasing this at Christmas when there aren't many other big budget action movies. If released in June, this would smack of Hudson Hawk.
Closer -- Jude Law and Julia Roberts.... Need I say more? Pardon me, I feel warm water bubbling up in the back of my throat.
Blade Trinity -- We're excited about this film. We enjoyed the first two Blade movies and the third one looks even better. We'll have a full review up about a week before it's released.
Ocean's Twelve -- The first movie was a hit because it was an ensemble piece with a wonderful cast. The gang is back for the sequel, so again our expectations are high.
Lemony Snicket's a Series of Unfortunate Events -- It looks like a Tim Burton flick, but it isn't. Jimmy Carrey stars in a quirky tale that aspires to be a family film.
Spanglish -- Adam Sandler finally turned in his gonads and apparently has decided to make full on chick flicks.
Flight of the Phoenix -- And this needed a remake why exactly? Maybe they thought they could upgrade the acting? Jimmy Stewart is a bit of a hack ya know.
Meet the Fockers -- The sequel to Meet the Parents. Her dad is again Robert De Niro, his dad is Dustin Hoffman. Sounds fun to me!
Fat Albert -- We used to love watching Fat Albert on saturday morning. Can he carry a live action movie for 90 minutes plus? We'll find out Christmas.
That's it for the movies worth mentioning that are headed to the theaters. We'll try to run down the new DVD releases for you later this week as well.
So let's take a look at what Hollywood is putting in our stockings this year....
Bridgette Jones: The Edge of Reason -- If we have to sit thru this film, it might drive us to the edge of insanity.
The Polar Express -- Nice animation, and we like Tom Hanks, but we can only stand so many movies packed with kids. And this one didn't make the cut.
The Incredibles -- Our review of this one is up and has caused a bit of controversy around the office. John is usually kind to Pixar films, but only gave this one 3 stars. Some of our other staff think it was a bit better than that.
Alexander -- Well, at least it makes Troy look better.
The SpongeBob Squarepants Movie -- Ok, forgive me, but I don't get SpongeBob. If you do, you'll probably see this one regardless of what I say.
Christmas with the Kranks -- Tim Allen and Jamie Lee Curtis decide to blow off Christmas, then they decide not to. Uhm, ok.
National Treasure -- A big budget Nicolas Cage and Jerry Bruckheimer film. Probably smart move releasing this at Christmas when there aren't many other big budget action movies. If released in June, this would smack of Hudson Hawk.
Closer -- Jude Law and Julia Roberts.... Need I say more? Pardon me, I feel warm water bubbling up in the back of my throat.
Blade Trinity -- We're excited about this film. We enjoyed the first two Blade movies and the third one looks even better. We'll have a full review up about a week before it's released.
Ocean's Twelve -- The first movie was a hit because it was an ensemble piece with a wonderful cast. The gang is back for the sequel, so again our expectations are high.
Lemony Snicket's a Series of Unfortunate Events -- It looks like a Tim Burton flick, but it isn't. Jimmy Carrey stars in a quirky tale that aspires to be a family film.
Spanglish -- Adam Sandler finally turned in his gonads and apparently has decided to make full on chick flicks.
Flight of the Phoenix -- And this needed a remake why exactly? Maybe they thought they could upgrade the acting? Jimmy Stewart is a bit of a hack ya know.
Meet the Fockers -- The sequel to Meet the Parents. Her dad is again Robert De Niro, his dad is Dustin Hoffman. Sounds fun to me!
Fat Albert -- We used to love watching Fat Albert on saturday morning. Can he carry a live action movie for 90 minutes plus? We'll find out Christmas.
That's it for the movies worth mentioning that are headed to the theaters. We'll try to run down the new DVD releases for you later this week as well.
