Valentine
	Rated R
	Runtime: 1hr 37min
	Starring:Daniel Cosgrove, Katherine Heigl, Katherine Heigi, David Boreanaz, Denise Richards
	MFG Rating: 3/5

Valentine is the type of movie that I suspect most mainstream critics are likely to skewer. I do not see any Oscar nominations forthcoming. However, it was basically exactly what we've come to expect from today's slasher flicks, and that's both good and bad in many ways.

The story here revolves around five young ladies who have been best friends since childhood. There was this kid in the sixth grade that was the kind of misfit kid that children will always pick on. The girls are certainly no different and at a Valentines Day dance things got out of hand and the young man ended up getting put away for the rest of his childhood.

We join the girls many years later as the young women are actively dating and looking for relationships. A really twisted Valentine shows up for each of them and people start dying, and the prime suspect turns out to be the kid they all made fun of back in the sixth grade. Our slasher here wears a cupid mask, and like most slashers isn't picky about his choice of weapons, he'll use whatever is sharp and handy. We did enjoy his Valentine cards though with text such as "Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, They'll need dental records to identify you!" Hallmark take note!

Of the cast, the only one of the girls you're likely to recognize is Denise Richards. And we were pleased that she played the member of the group who had a bit of a morally casual attitude that we really like. In other words, she's the slut of the bunch. We get lots of cleavage shots and even a bikini shot in the hot tub, but unfortunately nothing more from Denise or any of the girls. What the heck has happened to the obligatory bare breast shot in booger movies?

Overall, although we found the movie to be a bit formulatic, it delivered basically exactly what the trailers promised. Consequently it gets 3 stars from us although we do have some issues with it. Denise's breasts would've been good for another star! It seems the modern day slasher flick is almost trying to be more politically correct and cut back on the blood, etc. Unfortunately, it's a slasher flick, that's what we expect. It's going to get the R-rating for violence no matter what, so let us have our breast shot and let the blood fly. The people who gripe about such things do not go see these movies anyway. The ones who do see the movie know it is just that and are there to be entertained. Enforce the R-rating, keep out the kiddies, and give us the campy violence and indestructable boogers that we expect.

Enough of the soapbox. Bottom line if you've seen the trailer and it looks like a movie you'd like, you probably will. If you looked at the trailer and kinda shrugged, go see something else.

- Billy Bob