Stay Alive

March 24, 2006

Rated: PG-13 Runtime: 85 min Rating: 1 out of 5 stars

Stay Alive is one of the stupidest movies I’ve seen in a long time, just writing the review is causing me to lose IQ points, so I’ll make it brief.

Stay Alive There’s this videotape that if you watch it.. wait, wrong movie. There’s this video game, that if you play it and die you’ll end up dying in real life just like you did in the game. Even if that means getting hit by a 19th century horse drawn carriage, doesn’t matter, you’re gonna buy the farm.

But wait, what if you’ve got friends playing with you! And what if you’re not playing but a friend is and you get in trouble.. say.. caught in a tight space and need a crowbar. Not a problem, just have your friend drop one in the game and *poof*, you’ve got one in real life.

So. Utterly. Stupid.

This movie has nothing going for it, there’s barely even a hint that the eventual unrated DVD will contain any naughty bits, just more blood. The acting is OK I suppose, I didn’t really notice so that’s gotta be a good sign. The story though, I just can’t get past the story.

And the graphics! Yes, the movie switches into “game mode” numerous times so you’re forced to watch a fake video game.

So. Utterly. Stupid.

I usually like Frankie Muniz, but even he’s lame in this movie. Lame in a “Wesley Crusher-I-can-explain-everything” sort of way. As I said, it has nothing going for it. I’ll give it 1 star because I didn’t walk out, and I can’t give 0 stars anyway.

Posted by John | Filed Under 1 Stars, Frankie Muniz, Horror, Jimmi Simpson, Jon Foster, PG-13, Samaire Armstrong, Theatrical, Wendell Pierce