The Skulls

December 10, 2004

Rated: PG-13 Runtime: 107 min Rating: 2 out of 5 stars

Define Irony: A director who makes a movie about a secret society of intelligent, high-achieving people but films it in such a way that it makes sense only to people who have a room-temperature IQ. It’s a good thing that I have a built-in IQ adjuster or I might have walked out on this movie. At about the fifteen minute mark, I had already counted about a half-dozen absurdities and/or plot holes. Once I managed to turn my IQ down to about 80, however, it became somewhat tolerable.

The Skulls

Immediately recognizable was this movie’s worn out plot: Boy has friends. Boy gets involved in wrong crowd. Boy alienates friends. Boy spends rest of movie trying to redeem himself. Seen this one before? Yeah, me too. A few hundred times.

To make matters worse, both the boy and the “wrong crowd,” while supposedly very intelligent and resourceful, engage in behavior that defies all logic and common sense. For instance, if you were the leader of a society so secretive that it will go to any lengths to protect its interests, would you store the videotapes of its inner sanctum meetings in a public place? No? Me neither.

And where was the sex? There were 15 or so gorgeous hookers in the movie. And none got nekkid. What about the action? There were some truly prime sportscars in the movie as well. And none of them were driven more than 25 mph. I guess the director didn’t want us to be distracted from the plot. Yeah, right.

This one barely rates a “2″ and, if you’re determined to see it, make sure to take some IQ inhibitors before you venture out. Anyways, I think it’s time to go watch something a bit more intellectual. Let’s see…I know I’ve got a tape of “Corvette Summer” around here somewhere.

Posted by Alex | Filed Under 2 Stars, Craig T. Nelson, Drama, Joshua Jackson, Leslie Bibb, PG-13, Theatrical, and Paul Walker